WANTED: For Crimes Against Tulips

THE VICTIM:

Darwin Tulipa Liliaceae, age 2 years

On Monday, November 6, 2006, this tender pink tulip bulb was found stripped and left for dead in the mulch surrounding a rather seedy-looking area known for its high population of chrysanthemums. Victim appears to have been brutally nibbled.

When questioned, the locals kept mum.  Therefore, the exact circumstances of the crime are unknown, except that Ms.Liliaceae must have been taken from her bed sometime after she was planted, on or after October 20, 2006.

THE CRIME SCENE:

THE SUSPECT:

Percival "Pinky" Sciuridae

Suspect is not armed and is considered dangerous only to certain kinds of vegetable matter.  However, do not attempt to capture.  Repeat, do not attempt to capture.

KNOWN ASSOCIATES
AND FELLOW MEMBERS OF
THE NOTORIOUS
SCIURIDAE CRIME FAMILY:

Lucinda "Light Lips" Sciuridae is more known for her expertise at cracking bird feeders, but may be hiding something.  She can often be found swinging at local seed spots, as pictured at right.  Approach with extreme caution.  There's no telling what she might do if panicked.

Norbert "The Nose" Sciuridae, seen here at left, is in the business of information.  We believe this rare photo was taken in the days leading up to the crime, when he may have been furtively casing the very beds where Ms. Liliaceae and others of her family were being planted.

Mr. Sciuridae has been known to snitch.  However, take any information he offers with a grain of millet  There's not a lot he won't do for black oil sunflower seed.

Comments

[Cathy]

Ho yeah. This is a fiendish clan. Their cousin, Peter Pilferer, was photographed ransacking my hopes of Jack-o-lantern carving - check out his mug shot:
http://lookingup1.blogspot.com/2006/10/peter-peter-pumpkin-eater.html#links

[Sara]

Oh yes, that's a great shot, Cathy! I meant to tell you when you posted it, but I got distracted. My true love told me that one of our locals was sniffing over our one tiny little pumpkin the day before Hallowe'en, but I assured him that it was safe. Then I saw this photo.

No one's gotten into it yet, though. Maybe if no one does by Thanksgiving I'll crack it open and leave it for 'em to feast on.

As exasperating as I find their antics with the liliaceae family, I do love the little buggers. And the chipmunks. And all the birds. I feed them deliberately. I don't care about the mess or anything. I just never quite get over the shock of seeing my tulips dug up and eaten.

In another town, one of those brazen sciuridae used to dig them up and then hop up onto my garden bench to eat them while I watched from a window. Geez.

And that's one reason I don't plant so many tulips anymore.

[Cathy]

Sara, Squirrels never bother my daffodils. Really, there are so many beautiful varieties. Their promise gets me through the winter.

[Ron Sullivan]

I have a recipe for Brunswick Stew somewhere, and a California-natives maven recently mentioned his Memere's recipe for Squirrel Stomach Pie. (Acadian. For fall, when the stomachs are full of nuts.) Memere's beyond reciting the pie recipe, alas, but I could send you the stew one.

Those redbellied buggers are the species we have here -- not native, of course. They don't mind urban life and have displaced the native grays except in the wildlands. I mulch my outdoor pots with red pepper powder from the Korean supermarket, where it's cheap in large quantities.

[Sara]

Hmmm... I shall pass on the squirrel stomach pie, and the squirrel stew. I'm sorry, but the idea of eating rodent after having rescued so many from my cats and having had a guinea pig as a pet once upon a time rather palls on my palate.

So, I don't plant my tulips in pots, and here we don't lift them after blooming, even though they don't really like it in our wet soil any more than they like it in your warmer soil. If I dust the bulbs with red pepper before plugging them into the ground, will the squirrels dig them up, taste them, and discard them, or will they be turned away pre-dig or mid-dig by the smell?

Intriguing.