I was standing in Trader Joe's this evening, waiting for an employee from California wearing a knit In 'n' Out Burger cap and shorts to get back to me about the dried fruit ends and pieces packs they used to sell when I noticed a woman engrossed in picking the exactly right candy package kicking over a tiny living Christmas tree for sale and on display on the floor in front of the candy tower. She didn't even notice she'd done it, and rolled her cart away, frowning obliviously.
I went over to right the little tree, and a strange thing happened. Maybe it was the red tin bucket. Maybe it was the glitter. Maybe I'm just a magnet for downtrodden but attractive strays.
What difference does it make? Now we have something to sparkle under the holiday lights, to plant out in the spring, and maybe to feed a merry flock of cedar waxwings some other December to come.
Funny. I don't feel the slightest bit confused.
It's been awhile since there are, tragically, no Trader Joe's in my vicinity, but I do think this sort of confusion and need to take a stray home happens there. For me it was often stray chocolate treats, or cheap wine, or the frozen veggie meals.
Posted by: Kay | December 12, 2007 at 01:45 AM
Oh, yeah, I forgot to mention the gigantic stray box of assorted German cookies that somehow ended up in my cart, too. I don't even remember picking it up (she lied), but once I had it, since it so obviously wanted to come home with me, I felt it would be rude to reject it. ;)
Any future religion I may consider will also have to involve an awful lot of butter.
It is tragic that Trader Joe's is not yet in your vicinity. It is relatively new to this area, having moved here some years after we did, so I really can sympathize.
Posted by: Sara | December 12, 2007 at 08:14 AM
Aww. One year, after I had convinced my lovely ex-wife that christmas trees were silly and wasteful and pointless and messy and we really shouldn't bother, she came home with a spindly little tree, maybe about 2-1/2 feet tall, if that, standing in wet sand in an ice cream bucket.
"It followed me home," she said. "Can I keep it?"
How could I resist? We decorated it with plastic dinosaurs and Star Trek the Next Generation action figures, and pretty much anything shiny we found around the house.
I've been bringing home stray eggnog and truffles lately. No Trader Joe's here, though.
Posted by: alphabitch | December 12, 2007 at 11:07 AM
Hee. I like that story.
Poor little eggnogs and truffles. It's so kind of you to give them shelter in this cold, cold season. ;)
Posted by: Sara | December 12, 2007 at 11:16 AM
Oops, I saw "error" just as I was clicking to close the window. Not sure that comment went through. Sigh.
I said something about how I always forget that Christmas is a *Christian* holiday because I don't celebrate it as such, as isn't the evergreen tree a pagan thing, celebrating the solstice and all, co-opted by the Christians. Anyway, hope your sweet little tree is cheering up your house. And Happy Chanukah!
Posted by: Leslee | December 12, 2007 at 07:23 PM
Leslee, I'm sorry I missed your original presentation, but this works, too, and of course it is always lovely to see you here.
You want to know what makes me happiest about this tiny tree? The cat shows no interest in chewing on it. I was worried, because of the glitter. So far, though, the only plant he seems to view as his own personal salad is the palm tree.
Neither a pagan nor a Christian nor even a greens-hungry cat, I think living plants are good to have, and so is merriment.
Posted by: Sara | December 12, 2007 at 07:37 PM
You are a true kind soul, giving a home to those cookies. And the tree's cute, too.
BTW, I have indeed seen the Tick-- animated. Haven't seen the live action, as it was on about the time that we did away with our TV. I will have to reorganize the netflix queue.
Posted by: Bipolarlawyercook | December 12, 2007 at 08:23 PM
Yay for cat-resistant trees! And sorry I was belated on the Chanukah wishes. I'm a bit disombobulated this year.
Posted by: Leslee | December 12, 2007 at 08:36 PM
Thank you, BLC. I just believe in giving, you know? ;)
And don't worry about it, Leslee! I don't even celebrate Chanukah, per se. I just generally celebrate. :)
Latkes, trees, chocolate suffragists -- it's all good! And it's a lot easier to be merry now that I don't work retail.
Posted by: Sara | December 12, 2007 at 08:52 PM
This all is bringing to mind one of my favorite holiday tunes by Elmo * Patsy, "Percy the Puny Poinsettia." Ahem.
Percy the puny poinsettia
is hanging his bloom in dismay.
If they had just kept him wetta
he’d be a houseplant today.
Folks liked the other plants betta
now he’s alone on the shelf.
Even a plant with no uncle or aunt
shouldn’t spend Christmas Day by himself....
Warms the cockles, you know?
Posted by: sognatrice | December 13, 2007 at 04:23 PM
hahahahaha
That is fantastic. Thank you!
Oh, the cultural exchange that goes on in this place! It's a veritable salon (or saloon...).
Posted by: Sara | December 13, 2007 at 06:07 PM
I'm fairly sure chocolate suffragists can be done. Now I want to try.
It always kills me when people knock over plants and trees in stores. I go and pick them up. I'm glad you gave the poor wee thing a good home :)
Posted by: Amorette | December 13, 2007 at 07:30 PM
What kills me is that they don't notice at all, you know? They're so intent on whatever it is they're intent upon that they have absolutely not one iota of attention to spend on their surroundings or anything/one who might share their space.
I am a 200-lb., paper-white, blonde woman with one leg. And you know what? People walk into me all the time. Yes! In Cambridge and Boston especially, people walk right smack into me as though I am invisible. This is how focused people are on their own interests!
I have taken to walking through certain parts of Our Fair City with my hands sticking out in front of me, robot or tin-soldier fashion, just to create a little box around myself, a pair of guardrails as it were. It looks TOTALLY stupid. And people bump into them.
In a place where that can happen, a tiny tree in Trader Joe's has no chance whatsoever on the floor, in mid-December, at the base of a holiday merchandise display. None. So, besides that we like it and think it's cute, we are happy to have it, too, because now it has a shot at a future (if I don't accidentally kill it myself).
I look forward to seeing the chocolate suffragists! I was envisioning molded chocolate, but I don't know how to make chocolate molds from scratch, only molds for resins and polymer clay. I don't know what mold-making materials which can be bought in regular mold-maker-selling venues are food-safe, do you? Or do you have a special source?
It would be a drag to get Elizabeth Cady Stanton's cute little smirk just right and not be able to repeat it for future holidays.
Posted by: Sara | December 13, 2007 at 08:28 PM
I don't really have any sources, just what I call "bento eyes"...being able to (or trying to) manipulate food into something that resembles this or that. I'm not sure it can be done, but I can give it a try.
Sure you don't want a Masada instead? Chocolate carnage...
Posted by: Amorette | December 13, 2007 at 08:59 PM
I love Trader Joe's. When we lived in Jersey I went there all the time. We keep trying to get them to move to our down town but they won't. Bummer!
Posted by: Marla | December 13, 2007 at 11:07 PM
Amorette, far be it from me to inhibit your muse! While suicide stories just bum me out, if "chocolate carnage" in Bible land tickles your creative urge, I think you should go with it and see where it takes you.
Marla, as with others in your Trader Joe-less plight, you also have my sympathies. Stay strong.
Posted by: Sara | December 14, 2007 at 02:36 PM